Over the years, various friends of mine have been on Match.com looking for men.
Something has struck me about most of the men on there and I need to share it with the hopes that someone is listening.
The 90% of the men fall into these two categories:
A. I Am A Man's Man.
That's fine if you are. Fine.
But when your screen name is MustangMan or ilikebeer it's like you're trying to be cool to other men. Women don't care that you're obsessed with Mustangs, shhh keep a secret and don't make it your screen name. And the best way you can market yourself with is your love of beer? That's not gonna make the women swarm to your door, dude.
One guy I saw had as his very first photo, y'know the one you see when you click his profile, a picture of him covered in a dozen dead ducks he'd just shot. Sir, that was a bad decision. Women, in general, don't like hunting. Write that down.
Lots of self portrait, grainy photos with the up-the-nostril point of view. Not flattering on anyone. Or they look like beastly angry mugshots. Do you want a date or not?
or
B. I Think I Know What Women Want
They have names like natural_charmer and nice_guy_27. I don't know who wants that business. Their photos are trying to be the cover of Teen Beat, I can almost see them bat their lashes. Creepy! "Women tell me I have nice eyes..." Blech! Stop it already, I can't take it.
So gentlemen, let some women you know edit your profile. If you're not shopping for man-love or a soap opera role, change your ways.
Happy 18th Birthday, Alayna!
1 year ago
8 comments:
That's it, I'm putting a link to this post on my match profile.
Someone needs to help these people.
PS. The "cooler" guy wrote me back...
Great editorial! Maybe you can be the official man-editor for all the goobers trying to find sex...mmm I mean, get dates! Sure, that's what men are looking for; companionship and lots of talking...NOT!
A GREAT EDITORIAL ...I'VE NEVER GONE THERE AND SNOOPED ..I PERSONALLY WOULDN'T TRUST ANYONE WITH ALL THE WACKO'S OUT THERE. I THINK ONE THING I'D LOOK FOR WOULD BE SOMEONE WHO HAS A ZILLION FRIENDS AND THAT THE FRIENDS OR EX'GIRLFRIENDS HAD NOTHING BUT THE TRUTH TO SAY ABOUT HIM. JUST MY PERSONAL THOUGHTS FOR DATING ETC.
only george i tell ya... his comment was like a woman with the name PEEING IN THE SHOWER! GIGGLE
So... I probably shouldn't name my profile 'chunkylover53' or 'star wars underoos' ?
I don't know what to say. Really. I can't think of anything. I am quite drunk.
Praise Jebus!
I think there's a third category: "I'm rich, beotch!"
Dudes with names like "LoadedExec" and "RefinedProfessional" who lead with their wallets.
I bet they get a lot of action.
The irony is that you've criticized men for portraying themselves for who they are ("but I do shoot ducks!") but then criticized men for trying to seem more appealing to women ("um, yeah, I like to cuddle").
Seems the only guy who can win is one who genuinely likes to cuddle, but doesn't mention it, because doing so would make him fall in category 2? Seems a bit... complex? Impossible?
It's not easy or simple. But if you post a picture of yourself with dead ducks, then be prepared for the types of women (or lack of?) who will respond. It's not that it's bad to hunt ducks, and if that's one of your passions, so be it, there's nothing wrong with that. But it's probably not going to get you a date on match.com. DuckHunterSingles.com maybe.
Also I honestly don't know which women are looking for a man based on whether or not he likes to cuddle. The word "cuddle" makes me want to vomit. Just had to throw that in there.
This particular editorial is about things men do that they should be aware they're doing, but women do it too. Women post things on their profiles that are HUGE turn offs to men. I don't feel like she's taking a criticizing angle as much as pointing out things that would increase success in dating. Not pretending to be someone you're not just because you think someone else wants it, but learning how to hide things about yourself that no one should really talk about with someone they potentially want to date.
Just be conscious about how you portray yourself! Men AND women!
I should probably refrain from adding, but I like this thread. It's almost like an AA meeting, but not.
*stands up* "I am Tab and I am a Category 2."
*room responds* "Hi Tab."
I am, if anything, honest & upfront about who I am and I think that's what women want, but what do I know, I am a guy.
I agree Charlie is certainly not being critical, she is just making an observation.
*signs up for Charlie's class- Online Dating & Profile Creating 101*
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