dear public diary

1. I haven't checked my voice mail in months.
Because I have forgotten my password number.

And I tried once to reset it online, but the website was messed up. And I just gave up.
I wish I could access it just to record the message "I can't check my voice mail, sorry."

My phone also has this annoying glitch in it that fails to identify most people's numbers that I have saved in it.
And so I get dozens of text messages everyweek that I have to just guess who they are from based on context clues. Because I'm not about to go through my entire "address book" in the phone to figure it out.
It plays favorites-- about 6 or 7 people it recognizes everytime.



2. I'm in a recycling slump and Real Simple magazine it to blame.
I normally don't read Real Simple, because I have decided, in my very opinionated way, that Real Simple is just Good Housekeeping with sans serif fonts.
A "real simple" magazine, wouldn't have ads for commemorative plates, or prescription drugs (whose side effect warnings take up 4 pages). If it were "real" then the front of the magazine would be a photo of my dirty living room floor, and if it were "simple" it would come to your house automatically for free.
But I digress.
I bought an issue of the magazine to just have some peaceful non-thinking reading without articles about "what men really want" or "how to lose 20 lbs with carrot juice."
But when I read an article all about what can't be recycled, I found myself dispondent by the end of it. I wanted to believe in a subconcious way, that if it's made of plastic, they will find a way to recycle it. But there are so many things out there that contain multiple types of plastics melded in one item, that it's impossible to recycle, according to RS. The only happy thing I read was that paper recyclers can filter out metal staples and other little bits like that, easy peasy.

Ever since I read that article I find myself recycling less. Granted I'm a little stressed lately, and often I like to take my anxiety out on a #5 yogurt cup and toss it in the trash. But now it's like I have a little Eeyore voice in my head that says "it doesn't matter, no one else cares, why should you?"
I hope it's just a phase. I think a fresh recycling bin system will snap me out of it.


3. I'm a moody worker and I wish I weren't.
This is because according to the Myers Briggs personality standards, I am a "feeler."
And so I live my life more or less to how I feel about things.
Luckily, I'm pretty rational, for a feeler, and I really don't like drama or getting emotional.
But I wish that I could just say "Brain, this is what Body needs to get done today. I don't care how you do it, just make it happen."
I know that there are plenty of people that have that kind of control. I call them "organized."
I tell myself there's a trade-off somehow in it. That if I were more organized, then I wouldn't be able to name all the characters on Gilligans Island or sit in the grass and contemplate dandilions on a whim. I dunno.
The picture above is one of my current projects. The other, being Kyle's painting, is of most importance, and need to be done ASAP. But all it takes is one of the kids to have a tantrum, and I no longer feel like trying to get anything done. It kills my mood. I wish I could push past it.



4. We have mice living in our garage.
Our cat for once has a real purpose, and she has killed 4 of them already. Which is kinda bittersweet because they are very small and cute and all they do is eat the dog food and startle me when I'm doing the laundry. But I guess I can't exactly have pestilence in our home, so it's for the best in the end. She doesn't mangle them either which I think is nice. She does however display their corpses proudly where we are sure not to miss them, which is not nice.


5. I never get to go to the Half Moon Bay Pumpkin thing.
This is really minor, but I have always wanted to go.
It seems like millions of other people from the Bay Area also want to go. And they don't have kids, and they are willing to sit in traffic and then walk really really far, in order to be part of the action.
I've never been, but everyone tells me it's total mayhem. (the exact same is true for me and the Garlic Festival, though I'm not as keen on going to that).
I wish they put it on for a whole week, but I only have until tomorrow at 5pm to decide to go for it . Tomorrow is family fun day after all. ;)