Wednesday, February 23, 2005

NorCal good.

Lots of people that live here in the Bay Area think that southern california is better: cheaper housing, more glamourous, warmer, wealthier.
But I give you Exhibit A
Hello! In addition to people's houses sliding down the mountain in a muddy deluge, and people dying bizarre deaths and I quote "a 16-year-old girl who was doing homework in an apartment bedroom when boulders hit her home near Irvine" (death by boulder!!) they also have tornadoes.
So I say from comfy Santa Clara, you can keep your swimmin' pools and movie stars. NorCal reigns superior.
Note: When Kevin and I were house-shopping, I found out that only rental properties are built near creeks and rivers because when an earthquake hits, those houses turn to poo.

Tuesday, February 22, 2005


I told myself I would leave some for Kevin. By eating it right out of the tin, it's obvious I didn't have any *real* intentions of leaving any pie. Posted by Hello

Monday, February 21, 2005

very oddtodd of me

This show is cool. It's what I'm watching right now.
Say it. Zeugma
It's fun, do it. Zeugma
Zeugma.

maybe just a little pity...a pinch?

Preface: I am very blessed to have my job. Very very blessed.

The following is being transferred off three quarter-sheet scratch papers stapled together...

"I'm writing this post on a piece of my recycled-back-of-junk-fax at 9:11 a.m.-- That's a bad sign of job boredom. Fortunately, we've had a lot of patients come in this morning, so that keeps me reasonably occupied. But it's this unexplicable sleepiness that comes over me like a mickey that makes my job lean towards maddening. The calming music ain't helping either. I really feel like my head could hit the desk at any moment; good thing chiropractic attention is nearby.
I systematically segment my work time into smaller goals. For instance, 10am is only 2 hours away from leaving for lunch. So now it's almost 10 and I feel a little better.
This also happens to be the same concept that I use for my alarm clock (which isn't a clock at all, it's a cell phone). One alarm for 5:45, one for 6:00 and the last for 6:40. Again for instance, at 5:45 it goes something like this: *HAPPY JAPANESE ALARM SONG* "what? oh, it's okay I have another hour before I have to get up..." And then fifteen minutes later I think "yay 40 more minutes!" which is usually followed by lots of flopping back and forth happily, knowing I don't have to get up until the 3rd alarm.
As you can imagine, this is annoying to other sleeping people. Contact husband or prior roommates for details.
Oh my gosh, it's been 10 am for way too long! My hope is turning to despair everytime I look at the clock and it says "9:56....9:59...10:01....10:02" !!

....

There was more, but I really starting losing it when 10am seemed to last thirty minutes, and my post started going downhill.

Sunday, February 20, 2005

mystery!

A couple years back, Kevin and I walked into church (see link on side) one sunday and sat on the same row as this guy who was sitting by himself. He looked like he was about our age, so I said "hey kevin why don't you introduce yourself?" So he did and then I introduced myself and after service we thought we'd all get lunch. He knows this other girl we see on the way so she comes too. Very spur of the moment and I'm secretly patting myself on the back for being friendly and spontaneous. We go eat and we're not like the most alike people in the world, but hey I'm not that similar to alot of my friends. So I think Kevin and him exchange e-mail addresses and after that I think they might have once emailed each other. And after that, nothing! I'd see him, or the girl at church, and I wouldn't even get a smile.
Mystery!
Of course I think it's something I did or Kevin said to him. But insists he said nothing. So it's gotta be me! How could I have done/said something in those couple of hours to get cut off. What did I do?
I saw him this morning (I've since gleaned that he and the other girl are now an item and have been for sometime now) and I smiled and waved, hoping that time would heal whatever it is I did, but I got a big blank stare at close range!
I was discussing with Kevin, who of course could give a crap if someone doesn't like him, the odd fact that I have tried to be friendly to other guy-peers at church (I work on the technical side so there are many) and they're not very friendly to me. And I tried to draw a connection to the "mystery."
Either:
a) I am such a freak of nature, totally devoid of social skills that only nice old people will be friendly to me at church.
b) I'm such a smoldering vixen-temptress that they are afraid they will think lustful thoughts at me if they dare pay me any attention.
c) Boys aren't nice to girls, even when you're 20-somethings, unless they see you as a potential hook-up.

It's gotta be letter c! I refuse to believe I am that extreme on either side of the spectrum, although the paranoid in me leans towards letter a and the narcissist in me would love to believe letter b.

Of course it could be a mix of A and B. My "being social" somehow comes across like I'm hitting on them and they get weirded out. But hello, I got a big ol' wedding ring! Maybe I should begin with "Hi! I'm Charlie and I'm married and pregnant..."

Saturday, February 19, 2005


Dog sitting dog #2, Lola. Don't be fooled by the scale or stillness. She's neither small or stationary. Posted by Hello

Dog sitting dog #1, Oden. He's butting me as I type this Posted by Hello

Friday, February 18, 2005

I'm not gonna even have a reason!

So Aurora does really good long posts, and Allison's makin us all feel inadequte with the fancy-fangled audio posts-- and I'm laggin. So without a plan I'm posting!
Time: 1:05
Feelin: hungry and sleepy and thirsty
Dogs: whereabouts uncertain, they're free range right now

So I had to go solo to our couples Bible study last night. When Kevin told me he had to work I immediately thought "doesn't that mean I don't have to go?" 'Have to go'! What's wrong with me?! I like going. But my instinct is exert least effort necessary. Ugh, sometimes I don't know what to do with myself.
So I go, and it's really full this week, 7 couples. I scanned the 6 new faces to see if I saw any hope of finding another weirdo like me. I have a couple of leads but nothing solid so far. I tried to make up for last weeks ugliness by staying in my work clothes and keeping my smarty-pants glasses on the whole evening. I'm not sure if I fooled anyone because as soon as it came time for me to talk I sounded like suzy-cheerleader meets Rainman.
I finally get into a Bible study with adults and it makes me realize I'm not mature. Not like I wanted to be mature. But since I can't speak eloquently about my spiritual journey off the cuff, I've concluded that I will forever express myself like a fourteen year old: talk really really fast, don't make eye contact and be awkward enough to be funny.
I think I'm okay with that. I have this innate need to be different and I'm beginning to see that's how it's manifested itself.
Not to say that I can't play the "intellectual" role. I have to pull that card at any in-law family function. If I don't sound like I just fell off the Ivy league truck, then they won't pass the potatoes to me. (the grandparents are the only exception. I like them because they e-mail and watch the daily show and they like me because I wear funny tights and tell jokes).
Oh and I also brought our wedding album last night, because they said we'd have to tell the story of our relationship. I like visuals, so that's why I brought it. 'Ended up that not only did we not have time for everyone to go, but people were like telling their stories in 5 sentences or less. So I just hid the album between the other books as to not look like a nerd. But as I was leaving one girl spotted it and wanted to see it, and then everyone looked at it. Which brings me to another of my idiosyncracies: Announcing how little I paid for stuff. Why do I do that?! Some would say "nice ____" and I would follow it by "found it ____, only paid _____!" Which is of course followed by their expression of I-didn't-need-to-know-that. Occasionally I will find a shopping-hunter like me who appreciates it, but overall I just need to start rehearsing the line: Thank you very much.

*eyecontact* Thank you very much.
Oh thank you, how nice of you to say so.*Audrey Hepburn smile*
I'm so glad you like(d) it. *hands clasped*


(oh who am I kidding? I'll be Grace Kelley when my dogs win the Iditarod!)

Thursday, February 17, 2005


This is my dad Phil. Just let it sink in, like you were at a museum .What do you feel? Posted by Hello

cancellation policy

So I cancelled my "OB" visit for this morning. I found out that Kevin is on call so he couldn't come with me, and since this was supposed to be the hear-the-heartbeat appointment I wanted him to be there.
Plus, I really don't think I'm 3 months along. I'm sure it has to do with me giving her misinformation about myself. Either that, or those people count funny. I, like most regular chicks I know, don't meticulously mark my cycles on my calendar. So when they question me, I'm just guesstimating. And I'm thinking that threw her off.
So I'll just stay home and boil some nice artichokes. :D

Wednesday, February 16, 2005

Not that deep at all

Sometimes I wonder if I'm who I think I am. Not in an existentialist way, but in a "Am I that woman in the zebra pants?" kind of way.
How far away am I from looking like I just got out of rehab?
We had our first Bible study last week and I caught a glimpse of myself amidst the group in te over-the-couch mirror, and there was a clear contrast between me and the other members.
Maybe it was my sharky ponytail or my lack of make-up or it could have been my loud blue shirt. Not a good combo in hindsight. I think I could have frosted the look with toothpaste at the corners of my mouth and snotrags bulging out my jean pockets. (don't worry, I sported neither to my knowledge)

P.S. I believe that if I actually did lose my mind I *would* start wearing velour sweatsuits (you know the ones I mean) or neatly blowdrying my hair into place, and start blending in.

Monday, February 14, 2005

I make copy-cat quote

C: "The dogs are snuffling. Do you know for whom the dogs snuffle?"

K: "They snuffle for me"

-conversation with half-awake Kevin when I left for work last week

Thursday, February 10, 2005

problem solved

Here is the only acceptable family car I've found:sweet.

(too bad it's probably a death trap)

stupid air condtioner

So originally the plan for a me and my car, that hasn't had AC since 1 month after I bought it (grrr), was to wait a few more years and just get a whole new car. This would also be around the estimated baby-time, so it would all work out.
However it seems I'll be a big prego in the middle of summer and will also have a neworn when it's hot as well. And I know it gets hot enough in my car, even with all the windows down that Mojito nearly got heat stroke one time.
But it's so--- expensive to replace the broken parts (compressor, ac clutch, tubes, etc). like 900 bucks. Ugh. And in the back of my mind I'm thinking "the tires are gonna need to be replaced soon, and the wheel bearing, and replace the brake pads..."
I need to go on Price is Right and win a car.

Wednesday, February 09, 2005

Too weird not to share

Massage therapy is everywhere in my life now:
I work for a chiropractor (part of my job is referring patients to M.T.'s)
One friend of mine is beginning her practice.
Another friend is about to begin M.T. school.
(don't worry this post gets better...)
Also, across the way from my office is a suspicious "healing center" with a back door entrance and an unlikely woman who has an all male clientele.

It's that mysterious office that reminded me of a good story:

On Sam's birthday last year, I decided that we were both in need of massage. (her b-day's in May right around exams.) My idea was spur of the moment, so I knew that the MT's I'm familiar with from my office would be booked already. So I instead called the closest place in the phone book, down the street from our house. The woman spoke almost no english, but to a cheapskate like me that meant *lower price!*
The office was on a big street in a nice part of town. We parked and walked up to the door and as we were entering, a man that looked like he would slip a pill in your beer at a frat party walked out. An asian woman dressed like Forever 21 clearance rack had us go back to our rooms through a dark hallway. (suspicion should have begun now)
I had just walked in my room when an asian girl in a stretchy white sparkly juniors dress comes in and says "forty dollar now!" They had told me 30 on the phone, but I gave her my credit card anyway because I didn't think she would understand me if I argued. She brought back the slip to sign and I think I signed it on the wall or the floor, definitely remember it being awkward. She seemed annoyed with me as soon as she came in the room, but then asians always seem annoyed with me. When I laid down on the table I noticed it didn't have a headpiece so your face can lie flat, it was just like a padded table (bad sign!). She gave me a mamby pamby shiatsu (thanks to Jenn for doing practice massages on me for class, otherwise I wouldn't know) and then traded with another woman halfway through. Both of them went so fast I felt like a shrimp on the griddle at Benihana's.
Did I mention the room was really dark and had a huge mirror in it? Yeah, it was, and it did.
Afterward Sam and I met outside and I think I said "that was weird...was your lady weird?" She concurred.
It wasn't until later that I convinced myself that was one odd massage place. Also when I told people my story who get massages all the time, they looked at me like i had gone to an opium den. Hell, maybe I did, it was so dark I couldn't see...oh I forgot-- and there was a shower in there, a dark shower...

That place across from where I work has the exact same vibe. Same type of woman who works there. I keep thinking "maybe in China, all massage therapists wear mini skirts."
Tipping off the authorities is out of the question. I'll have the Chinese pimpin' mafia to deal with, I'm sure.

Lesson learned: Don't get massages from strangers in tight clothes.

Tuesday, February 08, 2005


chihuahua's can't resist blanket forts Posted by Hello

brilliant! Posted by Hello

the play pen just got better

I brought the last remainder of my crap home from texas on my last flight back. My sister let me use one of these gigantic tupperware containers to tote it home in, and ever since I emptied it here, I've had no idea what to do with it. Then Aurora told me she made a dog bed out of one of hers. So I took one of Kevin's old blankets (circa 1991) and 'upholstered' it and stuck the dog pillow Sam made for Mojito in there for more of a 'fort' feel.
Hooray, see they love it already.

Good thing I haven't given Brad my blog site, he probably wouldn't appreciate his face being broadcast to the internet. (take it up with my legal department) Posted by Hello

Obviously I only have a digital camera, and a photo album. Need scanner. :) Posted by Hello

Nothing, but it's something

I just have to put a new post up, that other one was way too serious! I couldn't take looking at it, and it's lack of comments, which is probably because it's too serious.
So 4 days until the cross country blind date between Allison and Brad. Since most people who read this blog only know one of them, I'll be posting photos above. I'm a little nervous about the whole thing, since I'm the mastermind. I think they're a good match, but I could also be a moron, so we'll see. Neither of them specifically asked for a date, nor have they ever expressed the need for one, so if the evening is monopolized by Kevin and I talking I shouldn't be surprised.

Sunday, February 06, 2005

I'm not political enough.

I've been browsing the land of other blogs tonight (post super bowl and while watching mythbusters) and it seems like most of the people who have my same interests, have political platforms.
I don't.
I try to avoid any specific political decisions/opinions unless I'm forced to when I vote (and I do vote, don't worry!).
There's very little I can think of that would cause me to write my local congressman, and only two things I would protest over. Otherwise, gosh, calm down people.
Yes, big business runs our lives and the little/poor man will always get screwed over. You can never make enough laws to stop people from being selfish, greedy or hateful. Anyone who has ever been to a 3rd world country knows the perspctive it gives you when you retutrn home. This country is like Disneyland.
Even if we went to war for the wrong reasons, Bush isn't an evil dictator that tried to rub out Kerry.
And if everyone in this country isn't courteous to homosexuals, notice they aren't being exterminated by the masses.
What I'm trying to say is, we (especially we the middle class youth of america) need to appreciate what we have.
Ok, there I was political, now I'm an official blogger.

Puppy Bowl!!!!

It's really happening! Puppy Bowl!


Figure 2. for #20...that's Kevin btw Posted by Hello

Figure 1. for #20 on my list Posted by Hello

Friday, February 04, 2005

The 100 List [the first 33]

Aurora said that 100 lists are narcississtic, and she's totally right. I'm doin' it, because it's all I know.

1. I love to eat at work
2. I won't get my lazy ass up out of bed 10 minutes earlier so that I can get starbucks muffins for work. Even though when I'm at work, I would give my pinky toes for one.
3. My dogs guilt trip me into letting them up on the couch with me, even though they fart and snort.
4. I'm not very nice to our cat, but I make an effort once in a while.
5. I hate it when my shirt rides up (all the time!)and then it looks like I'm a slovenly ho'.
6. I don't like dirty keyboards or remote controls.
7. But that doesn't stop me from eating while typing or channel surfing.
8. One of the reasons I chose to live in the Bay Area is because it's near the ocean.
9. But I also think the water's too cold, it's got too much kelp in it and surfers get attcked by sharks- so I just look at it.
10. When I go to any salon, they like go on and on about how tangly and fine my hair is--- I know!
11. The king of my "closet-music" collection is James Taylor (love him!)
12. My two phobias are mental illness and falling into murky water.
13. I have personalized california poppy plates that say "DEI *heart* PAX" (God, love, peace)
14. I think Chiropractic is important for everyone. (www.drtracy.net)
15. I believe in Jesus (Son of God, rose from the dead, paid for the world's sins.)
16. I fully support the Intelligent Design movement in science education.
17. Sometimes at work, I want to crawl under my desk and take a nap.
18. In college I was too cheap to buy good art supplies (I was an art major), and I used crayola crayons to do 2 assignments. (shameless!)
19. I hate astrology.
20. If my chihuahua could have his way, he would never stop licking people.
21. I love Boston, Bad Company, Steve Miller Band, and the Guess Who, but I've had a strange fear of committing to buying their albums for the last 10 years.
22.I like Tex-Mex way better than "real" Mexican food.
23. Once when I was in Reyonosa Mexico, I was served a tamale with part of a pig snout in it. Mercy!
24. My husband proposed to me with a house and an analogy about house cats.
25. I said yes and then I unintentionally pounced.
26. I avoid beige, grey, olive, and pastel colors whenever possible.
27. I think all windows on houses should have shutters (the fake kind I mean, but hey real would be cool.) There's a severe lack of shutters 'round these parts.
28. I could never be a salesman, a group home counselor, or a fire fighter. Anyone who knows me being kempt&pushy, confronting, and physical strength are not my strong points.
29. I love polka-dots and stripes and
I hope I never get over them.
30. Pirates, pirates and more pirates! Hooray!
31. Generally I don't like reality TV. Exceptions are: Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, Extreme Home Makeover and What Not to Wear. Happy and Helpy shows.
32. I will fast forward through cry-able scenes or uncomfortable moments in TV or DVD's. If I can't ff, I bury my head.
33. I don't like Pink Floyd, Rolling Stones, Nirvana or Smashing Pumpkins. Die hard music people seem to think I'm idiot for that.

Thursday, February 03, 2005

Nombres nombres nombres

Like people (chicks) I know, I have been selecting names for my future children since I was probably-- 7rs old. And I thought I had my mind made up about the names way before I ever saw that little pink line on the test. ..(How can a Boston Terrier possibly get enough oxygen with his face pressed in my elbow pit?)...But then I made a mistake, telling people the names! Now of course, I doubt my otherwise sound judgement. I find myself driving around and searching for any text I can find on street signs, advertisements or car names. I think I'm starting to obsess. Which makes me think: I should just make up my mind now.
Please. Make up my mind now, like I can do that. I dont know how people who decide that they're naming their son John Jr. in month one, can live with themselves? How can they not give into the tempation of another better name out there?
What I'm really hoping most of all is that I don't look at my child years later and think "man, what a stupid name."
But what I won't do is offer up a vote for people. Damn right won't. Other people pick names like Caitlin, McKenna, and Connor.
{{disclaimer}} My apologies to anyone who named their child any of the above names, I'm sure they're perfectly nice children.}
So I've decided to keep my final decision top secret, classified information. Everyone will just have to wait until D-day to hear the results of my months of obsession.
(anything to make me feel more like a secret agent :) )



Tuesday, February 01, 2005

Top 9 Reasons Allison should move here.

(I like 9 better than 10, because I'm a special person)

9. Trader Joe's grocery stores

8. Dog Beaches

7. IKEA

6. It's an anti-Bush area

5. Abby needs a little boston boyfriend named Franklin, and a little latin-lover on the side named Mojito

4. Brad!

3. Less Hummers

2. More geography

1. It's not DFW