Progress! The builders have started to build, and soon(ish) this will be a second bathroom.  

Harnesses! Ready for the road trip! Mojito acted like I was hurting him when I put it on. 

H-ha! I'm totally going out and getting these for our roadtrip tomorrow for Franklin and Mojito. And they'll hate me for it. 

Like a McGruff safety pamphet

Last night Kevin's mom said that when Kevin was a baby he had "one of the first car seats," and I found this hard to believe. He was born in 1977, surely people didnt just carry their babies like Big Gulps bewteen their knees while they drove before 1977.
So I looked it up, and apparently his seat was one of the first mandated ones. I guess people just tossed babies in the back floorboard on the way to the supermarket before the government made laws against it. But car seats had been around before then, thank you Swedes once again.
Aurora, did you have a car seat?
My rabbit trail search continued and I found this disturbing fact:
An independent nationwide poll on child passenger safety reveals that 21 percent of grandparents - one in five - say they "never" use a child safety seat when they have their grandchildren as passengers.
Grandparents--, they let your kids get away with murder, and then they try and murder your kids.

this is not helping

So as I've mentioned before, I plan on using cloth diapers. Don't flip out, this is why:
-It Takes 20 Trees to Diaper One Baby in Disposables for 2 Years
25,000,000 trees are cut annually for this one product in the United States.
-Single-use diapers represent the 3rd largest consumer item (after newspapers and beverage and food containers) in the municipal solid waste stream. These diapers will require over 500 years to decompose.
-Not since the Middle Ages has there been so much human waste in our garbage. There is NO safe way to dispose of single-use diapers. Flushing them down the toilet causes 95% of clogged sewer lines in the US, and creates 43,000 tons of extra sludge per year. Most people simply toss these soiled single-use diaper into household, hospital, or roadside garbage. This adds 84 million pounds of raw fecal matter to our environment per year.

Knowing this, and also knowing that "Mom" will be my full time job, I knew that I should "go cloth." I'm not doing it to be earthy or make my life harder. I'm doing it out of sheer guilt. Incidentally, that's the same reason I recycle.

And so, I've been researching how this whole business works, cloth diapering that is. Depending on who you talk to, and what you read on the web, difficulty levels vary.
It's all very confusing at this point, and it's not from a lack of information. The world is super saturated with cloth diapering products and advice.
Here's a maddening example:
"How To Wash Diapers

Unstuff any Fuzzibunz and unfold diapers as you put them in. Close any velcro tabs. Spray any poop with Zout. DO NOT put any wool covers in the washer, ever.

First Step: SOAK
put in detergent halfway up to the first line on the cup. (NEVER use fabric softener)
put in the diapers (including fuzzibunz), but not the covers or pail liner.
set the washer to:
- cold wash
- cold rinse
- second rinse
- high water level
- regular agitation
- SOAK on the dial

The washer will agitate and then stop.

LET IT SOAK for at least one hour. Longer if there is a lot of poopy diapers. As long as you want to if you are going out or busy.

SECOND STEP: PREWASH
Turn the dial to prewash and let it run through. (this agitates for 4 minutes and spins out the water but does not rinse)

THIRD STEP: HOT WASH
Turn the dial to regular wash. Add just a touch more detergent, just enough to cover the bottom of the cup. Put in the covers and the pail liner turned inside out. Let it run all the way through spinning.

Take out the pail liner and hang it up to dry.

FOURTH STEP: extra rinses
Turn the dial back to rinse so that it goes through two more rinses. Every other wash time, or if the Joeybunz are feeling crispy, run through two more rinses. You can also check the water of the last rinse and if there are still suds in it, run more rinses.

FIFTH STEP: extra spin
turn the dial back to spin and spin it again. This helps them to dry faster

SIXTH STEP: drying
Hang up the Fuzzibunz and the covers (including the fleece covers), put the rest in the dryer on medium heat. Once in awhile, put the plain white (Green Earth and ProRaps) covers in the dryer, especially if they have been leaking. After the dryer stops, take out what is dry and start it up again."

Um, that can't all be necessary. Anyone getting visions of the "Anal Retentive Chef" from SNL?
None of this is shaking my confidence that I'll follow through, I just want to get my game plan down. But I am sure that I'm not going to follow that woman's wash routine, she's crazy.
We might even use the local diaper service. Still tryin to figure out what's cheaper.

Ok enough information. Entertainment time!

Fig. 1.
Toyota Corolla, public enemy #1. Be afraid! 

Explaination upon request.

I think it was Kevin who asked me to blog about the concept of the "tan sedan."
I developed this theory shortly after I moved to the [Silicon] Valley. It is as follows:
tan se·dan n.
1. Any beige, tan, biscuit, brownish, buff, coffee, drab, ecru, gold, khaki, sand, or tawny colored foreign 4-door vehicle, often driven by a non-caucasian person, that is exteremely dangerous and should be avoided on roads and parking lots at all times.
Note: Not all non-caucasians are dangerous drivers. Only when behind the wheel of a tan sedan are they hazardous to public safety.
See Fig. 1 and Fig 2 If you find your self with a view like Fig 2 in real life, get away as fast as you can. They show no mercy.

If you think I'm just making this up, just watch and you'll see I'm on to something. Especially if you live around here. When someone rides your butt-- tan sedan. When someone swerves into your lane-- tan sedan. No blinker?-- tan sedan!
I'm also not saying that there aren't other sterotypes that are bad drivers. Any of the manhood-compensator trucks, as I like to call them, are also bad. But I think they're bad on purpose. They usually seem like they have unresolved anger issues that manifest in tailgating and peeling out around little girls in honda civics like me. "Yes, I see. You're the bad-ass. Good for you."
And anyone who drives a Volvo is also to be feared. Volvos are famously safe, so I believe that people who buy them know that they are horrible drivers. Kevin reminded me of this when I wanted to get one. And I'll be honest, I fit in that category. I drive like a granma and my reflexes suck.
But I verily I say to you: beware of the tan sedan!

"Let's hear it for the boy!"

Kevin's such a pumpkin for painting the baby's room today (and last night for that matter). I could only do paint prep, like taping, because I'm not supposed to breathe the fumes.
As you can see we have a nice "Marmalade" color on 3 walls, and "Electric Pink" on the fourth/feature wall. In the foreground, please note the $50 crib and the free twin bed. Okay the yellow bed was mine for about a year before we got married, I bought it of of craigslist. But, the cool thing about it, other than being free, is that the girl said her grandfather made it. It's like-- almost sentimental. 

Yay for Kevin! 

I haven't had much luck with bums.

Having lived in Santa Cruz for 3 years, I got alot of bum exposure, and I don't mean the full monty kind either. I mean the c-c-c-crazy kind, or the decided to reject modern society kind. Anyway, in Santa Cruz they're everywhere. I learned from someone on the "inside," that is, someone who worked with the homeless and shelters, that in S.C. at least, that there is always somewhere they can sleep at night, and get a meal, the programs are very generous. So he said, to not ever give them money.
I did a few times, and they usually ended badly. In particular, it seems I paid for some guy's sexual favor (aaaa!!) because right after I gave him the cash I had on me, he and another guy followed each other into a downtown port-a-potty. Another time, I gave this crazy woman all the cash I had, that was supposed to pay for my food for the rest of the week and then she proceded to ask for more and then get hostile.
Like I said, it never goes well for me.
So I don't know why I thought today would be any different. I guess because it's San Jose, not Santa Cruz, and I don't know how good the shelters are here, I dunno. I drive up to a stoplight where there is usually a guy with a cardboard sign (not always the same guy, I guess they rotate, or rock paper scissors for the spot). I keep little Jack in Box bucks in my glove box so I can give those instead of money. I handed the guy some of those and two dollars. He was very nice and apreciative, he even made polite conversation with me-- right before his cell phone rang! That's right, cell phone, the cardboard sign guy on the highway offramp, had to take a call.
C'mon, at least put in on vibrate to make the whole thing more convincing.
Oh well. It doesn't really matter to me how bad he needed what I gave him. But I did think, "gosh, I guess even homeless people are better about answering their phones than I am."

ok now it's real

Summer arrived today for me. I had to drive my car just now, which I had forgotten to move into the garage so it wouldn't sit in the sun all day. So yes, it sat in the sun all day and it was absolutely equitorial inside it by 5pm.
I had the T-shirt on the steering wheel like an oven mit as I drove, and it even burned my hands through that. My make-up bag was like the dressing section at a salad bar. I worried for my CD's. I try to take the little binder of them out of the car the night before if I think they might get a cookin', but like I said I forgot alot of things. I've warped many a CD that way. It wasn't hot enough to melt the LCD clock in my dash like it was with my Honda in Dallas in high school. I kept socks on hand for steering wheel mits then. (The sunroof didn't have a cover, that didn't help.)
Now I'm at home with a headache from the heat and glare of of the other cars, (does that bother anyone else?) eating pickles out of the jar.
And for those of you who haven't spent time in the summer in someone's *house* in California, I must let you in on a little insanity: Almost no one has A/C. Like, they're in denial that it ever gets hot here. Nevermind that the businesses all have A/C. School and homes, nope. News flash- it gets hot. And also in breaking news, it also gets cold, and most houses only have wall heaters. Um, how is a giant toaster supposed to warm the whole house. It doesn't. People are surprised when I complain about being hot saying "I thought you're from Texas." And I reply "yeah, we have a thing called air conditioning and it's everywhere, even outside sometimes."
Point of all that: I'm hot.

Two totally unrelated things

#1. I finally got a DVD of my Easter performance and we're working on getting into the right format to put it online for everyone to see.
#2. If you don't watch Extreme Home Makeover, you need to! I bawl like a baby everytime it's on TV. It combines my favorite things: philatropy and design. It's on right now and they're bulding a new home for the family of the first woman to die in combat in Iraq. Wait, it gets more poignant, her parents live on a poor Navajo reservation and take care of her kids in a trailer. Hello! Frickin' awesome!

Element

Kevin and I have semi-decided that when we buy a new car, we would like it to be a Honda Element.
We don't know when this would be, probably when one of our cars dies.
But it's cheap and has good safety ratings (and that's mostly what I look for in a car), plus you can hose down the inside and it's muy handy. (and it's not a mini van! and it's got good gas milage).

Ow!

I just got stung by a wasp! At least I think it was a wasp, it looked something like this.
I've never been stung by a wasp or a bee (I didn't get out much as a kid, Aurora can back me up on that), so I stared at my foot to see it would puff up. It didn't, I guess I'm not allergic.
I have it elevated, in the most un-lady-like pose, right now as I type this.
Stupid wasp, why did you have to get all mad when I stepped on you?

It had been far too long without a photo! (corbis? what corbis?) 

Registry Time!

I do feel a little guilty because it was only last summer that I was making my wedding registry, and now I'm making a baby registry. Sorry folks.
My New Baby Registry
I'm still tweaking the details, like the font and the colors and layout.
But it works! Feel free to browse.

addicting for those who think the world is out to get them

Not only because I'm a prego, but also because I like products that are nice to me
You have to really look at why they score high or low though. I'm starting to think the hippies are the only ones avoiding killer chemicals, because they don't use any products. I mean, poor ol' earth-lovin Burt's Bees even scores high in a lot of categories.
I just looked for phthalate esters and aluminum compounds, those are the only chemicals that I'm more or less convinced are really bad.

Valu-Pak-- extra savings inside

Stuff's been happening so a quality post is in order. Plus, it's only 9am and I've run out of things to do at work.
I've got the sugar-sleepies thanks to a cherry cheese streudel from Noah's. I've you've never had one, have one, but you'll have to avoid operating heavy machinery because it will knock you out like NyQuil. The loss of motor skills is worth it though. I had other food for breakfast too, but I won't lie to you, the strudel was the star of the show.
In case you hadn't read my sister's blog, she's pregnant too. How bout that? If you're a man and you're reading this, you probably have begun skimming. But if you're a woman, you're thinking "oh my gosh!" And now I have the overriding guilt that we don't live closer to each other. Well whatcha gonna do, I guess.
We got a crib on monday night (men, just keep skimming). "We" was Allison, and her handy SUV, as well as Carrie, my friend from Dallas that popped into town for a couple of days. I participated very little in the whole operation, other than paying for it (Allison's reading this and thinking, 'yeah and you also tried to make me wreck my car!'). They loaded it in, Allison drove it over, and Carrie put it together. The only entertaining thing about the crib purchase is that it's used and I was warned in the craigslist ad that it had "teething marks." That kid musta been a little beaver because it the top edges look like they had a dremel once over.
Back to Carrie-- She's very organized, all of her family is-- they've got 6 kids, but I didn't realize how unorganized I was until she came and helped me out. Sorry, future baby, there doesn't seem to be much hope for you to be organized either, Kevin and I are not role models in that department. Good thing she's the law student and I'm the soon to be unemployed la-la-art-teacher.

it was way clearer and bluer than this photo, but this was the only one I could find online of "Surfers Beach" Look at those waves, who could surf on that? 

beach dogs

I'm still not sure if they actually liked it, but we took the 'woggies' to the beach today. They had never actually been on the beach. I've taken them on a couple of car rides to look at the beach, but this was the first paw-on-sand experience for them. It was indeed a lovely day and the beach we went to was good for dogs (and one of the few that allows them) because the waves are puny.
Anyway, I think it freaked them out a little, but anytime they get to run around and sniff new stinky things, they're happy. I did trick them into the path of an approaching wave a couple of times-- the water was pretty dang cold, and I liked to watch their reaction.
Mojito menaced the beach a bit. He accosted a woman laying on a towel at full speed and began licking her ear. She, as I would have done, swatted him away, and he came running back to me proudly. I also noticed him doing the move which I call "breakdance" (rolling over and rubbing his back on the ground) a few yards away. He kept doing it, and worried that he might be breakdancing in some other dogs's poop, I went over to investigate. It was a dead crab, a big fatty too. I don't get dogs.

I'm slightly more famous

pictures of me in action, no not the Will Ferrel post, the one below that.
Sorry, no obligatory belly shots, for those of you who have asked for them. I am however, wearing a completely ridiculous tube top.

Captain, the hormones are firing! Sheilds up!

I was shopping today and I wandered into the baby section, because there was a sale. (people, 50% off everything, it was sweet!) At the bootie rack,I cracked. A pair of little red mary janes made me get choked up. (plus they were only two dollars, so you bet I bought them!)
And the dogs-- I'm getting all maternal with them. They have never seemed so unbelievably cute before and I think about them during the day when I'm away.
What is going on with me?!

another frame of interest

I was sitting at a stoplight on the "Larry" Expressway, and in front of me was a mid 90's Toyota Tercel with bubbling home-job window tint. Its license plate frame said in engraved lettering: "Madly In Love-- Deeply in Dept."
Shows what I know, I thought it was spelled d-e-b-t.
Maybe it was like a free prize in the window tint kit.

The price is wrong, bi... wait no, I love you Bob

In just a few weeks, it could be me and Bob.

 
I just got back from the dentist, with my Carl's Jr. Famous Star with chesse (mmmm) and I switched on TV to keep me company while I eat. The tail end of the Price is Right was on, and then it came to me.
I could go on the Price Is Right! Me! I could, I'm an adult, living in California, and I have a weird name, what am I waiting for?
I've had this theory since I was a kid that they call people to "come on down" who have odd names. And that if I ever got the chance, I was sure to be called!
I already requested 3 tickets for June 6th (because there's a good chance I'll have that day off of work). I ordered one for Kevin's friend who lives down there, I guess I should ask him, ha.

I was comissioned to do this for church...get it? yeah I know, it's cheezy. 

It could have been inferred...

...that I don't like phones.
I feel the need to be clear about this so no one takes my phone-avoidance personally. But I do avoid them, and if you've ever called me, you might have picked up on this.
I heard once at a seminar from a very successful business man the following quote: "If you don't want to be found, you don't have to be." (He was talking about taking after hour phone calls) I like to think that justifies my behavior.
I just looked over at my home answering machine and it was literally blinking "50," as in 50 messages. Yep, 50. Once it got over 10, I stopped checking. I'm just being honest here. So if any of those were yours, sorry bout that.
I just turned the machine to "Answer Off."
My voice mail gets checked about 3 times a week, sometimes twice.
I of course get the reaction "why do you even have a cell phone?"
Here's why:
If I need to ask Kevin what we need while I'm at the grocery store.
If I'm going to be late somewhere.
If I need to call for directions while on the way to somewhere.

Once again, this should not be taken personally. My apologies, but that's me.
FYI, Kevin doesn't check messages either, so we have an understanding. Peas in a pod, we are.

hot diggity dog!

I got it! Does a high chair get any cooler than that?

Pre-Mother's Day Nugget

Kevin and I were walking in a parking lot back to our cars and we saw a personalized plate that said "OEDIPUS." Let me catch you before you start pondering why someone would pay to have that on their car-- it was framed with the words "I *heart* my mother".
Um...

good heavens

I received an email today from one Cunera Bushbury of Cunera155@fhndgermse.powernolimits.net.

I truly hope no woman actually has that name.

And Miss Bushbury, if that is your real name, I don't believe you that your "work from home" jobs are "legal and profitable."

So there.

"you are not a warrior, you are just a little gerken!"

Enough with the weirdness of yesterday! Today is a new day and I shall post.
Everyone knows the cliche of pickles and ice cream cravings. Everyone also likes to ask me about my cravings. It's just chocolate right now (Kevin just doesn't understand why I need so many brownies). But I was at the store yesterday and was in the pickle aisle, so I bought some just in case. I'm at home for lunch right now, and I didn't want to cook something just yet so I pulled out the pickle jar and ate one...
then another...
and another...
I think I've eaten 6 in the last ten minutes. They're German, maybe that has something to do with it. Or that they happen to taste just like a cucumber version of salt and vinegar potato chips, which are irresistible themselves.
Either way my sodium is through the roof now, so I'll exercise self control and put them back...just one more...

his comment shoud have its own space

This gentleman posted this comment to my last post, but I thought it more appropriate to put it out here on it own. (I'm all about appropriate):

"You have a riveting web log and undoubtedly
must have atypical & quiescent potential for
your intended readership. May I suggest that
you do everything in your power to honor
your Designer/Architect as well as your audience.
Please remember to never restrict anyone's
opportunities for ascertaining uninterrupted
existence for their quintessence.

Best wishes for continued ascendancy,
Howdy
Editor

'Thought & Humor'
Cyber-Humor & Cyber-Thought
http://ilovehowdy.blogspot.com/
Harvard Humor Club
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Harvard_Humor_Club/"

I know, I know, we're all thinking "hello thesaurus."
I think what he means to say is "you should give more attention to God in your blog." Fair enough. I do think about blogging about my whole meaning for living, but frankly it's not that entertaining, so I don't. Lots of things happen in my life that I don't post about. But to be fair on this post, I'll share a few morsels about it:
I accepted Chirst as my savior in 1990. I made the decision on my own, and I didn't grow up in a "church home." I was baptized at age 17 at Fellowship Bible Church of Dallas, a church which I also chose on my own (the reason I explain that is because many non-christians think we're all brainwashed conformers that don't think.) I have been to Mexico twice to help build homes and churches in the name of Christ, and two years ago I went to Togo, Africa to help with Christian humanitarian efforts there. I now attend Westgate Church in San Jose (see link on side), which is another non-denominational Christian church. All of this is just the tangible stuff of my faith that I offer up because I like illustrations and what real faith is about isn't really visible. It's hardly explainable. But the bottom line is, Christ is the only way possible for us to be together with God-- in a limited sense here on earth, and eternally after this life is over. God designed it that way. It's the only thing I can say *I know.*
It's so much more multi-faceted than that. But I'll leave it there.

(now I'm starting to doubt my interpretation of that guy's comment, maybe he was talking about something totally different, oh well.)

when you think of Mother's Day

According to mass advertising, the appropriate gifts for your mom on mother's day are:
-flowers
-doodads or chachskies that come from Hallmark and say "mom"
-really mushy cards that fold out into like 4 panels of poetry

But I'd like to share what I sent *my* mom for mother's day:
-3 pairs of "Texas Hold 'Em" underwear
-A card "from the dog" that basicly says "sorry no flowers, how about some fertilizer?"

And you know what? She'll love it. May my daughter be as clever as I am. ;)

Okay, here they are

This is what he usually looks like, minus glasses. 

Due to Allison's references, I must give you the comparison...Kevin... 

Rhett. 

aurora's meme

So apparently I'm obligated to do this meme. Alright, you twisted my arm:

If I could be a chef, I would make so much pie. Pie pie pie. I'd be like the Pie Man, but sans the evil mustache. The only savory exception would be the chicken-pot variety, that I've come to appreciate thanks to Kevin. And speaking of Kevin, I am certain, that if I were a pie chef, Kevin's family would still think that he secretly made the pie, and that I am incompetent to do so.

If I could be a librarian, no one would like my library but me. I would take out all the engineering books, vietnamese comic books, and harlequin romances(this includes the Danielle Steele type novels that line checkout stands). I would also make sure no book by Bishop Spong, Dan Brown or Thomas Huxley would ever be found on my shelves. Oh and knowing me, there would be more books on the to-be-shelved carts than on the actual shelves.

If I could be a llama rider, (I can't believe someone other than me or Daniel would incorporate llamas into a meme) I would probably smell bad. Especially my pants, they would smell like sweaty llamas. But I bet we wouldnt have to mow the lawn or pay as much for gas. I would also make the llama wear funny hats. I don't have a reason, and I shouldn't have to. It's my llama fantasy.

If I could be an architect, I would design stuff like Gaudi. His buildings look like they are made from food. (Don't eat them! You'll get in trouble with el policia)

If I could be an inn-keeper, I would want my inn to be tacky, like the Madonna Inn, in which every room is designed differently and decorated like Disney meets an old west saloon. Oh and gentlemen, inside the bathroom in the lounge, there's a waterfall urinal. Yes, that's right, a motion sensored, landscaped waterfall. (Obviously, I had to do recon, but I wouldn't be the first girl who peeked in.) That's the kind of creative thinking I appreciate.

This is the list I chose from, FYI:
Choose your poison...
If I could be a scientist
If I could be a farmer
If I could be a musician
If I could be a doctor
If I could be a painter
If I could be a gardener
If I could be a missionary
If I could be a chef
If I could be an architect
If I could be a linguist
If I could be a psychologist
If I could be a librarian
If I could be an athlete
If I could be a lawyer
If I could be an inn-keeper
If I could be a professor
If I could be a writer
If I could be a llama-rider
If I could be a bonnie pirate
If I could be an astronaut
If I could be a world famous blogger
If I could be a justice on any one court in the world
If I could be married to any current famous political figure

You're supposed to pick out 5 and nd it to 2 other bloggers. Eh, I ain't sendin' it.

So great! And if any of you thinks I won't put my little girl in it-- watch me! (Couture by Baby Gap) 

see last title

Sonogram day results.....GIRL!

for all those who like babies and baby updates

(I'll be honest, if it wasn't my body involved, I wouldn't fit into the category described in this title)
I've got kicks, lots of kicks. Especially when I have bad posture or eat too much sugar. It's like, hey, who's the mom here? I'm supposed to tell *you* what you're doing wrong!

cingular- spell check- singular

So I downloaded my first ringtone for my phone. As I expected, the whole thing was caca.
The last phone I had was too ancient to download ringtones, though I wanted them so badly! Now I have a new pretty phone which actually came with some good ones. But of course, as any young American would, I got tired of them so I wanted something different. I had tried once before do download one (Don't Fear the Reaper, of all things, I don't know what I was thinking, I might have been influenced by the cowbell) but it never came to my phone and I wasn't charged, so I just called it a draw.
But then I was inspred to get a "ringback tone" by one of our patients. Whenever I call her cell phone it plays a Beyonce song, like the real song. I like it, because instead of hearing "ring ring" you hear a song. So I came home, and to Kevin's disappointment I searched to see if I could get one too. (he's probably shaking his head at this whole post.) I found that only Verizon offers it, unless you live in Finland or China.
So then I was re-inspired to get a good ringtone. But cellular politics dealt me a dirty hand! Cingular bought AT&T, which I was part of, so now we ex-AT&Ters are Cingular's stepchildren. There was such a good ring on their website that I wanted-- but I couldn't have it because I was the bastard daughter of their mega-merger-of-passion. Instead I got a little window that says, push these buttons on your phone and you can download from the menu that pops up. I was hesitant, but I had already invested wasted time in this adventure so I thought I'd keep walking down the dark path. It took forever to do it on my phone, and you can't listen to them, you just have to buy and then hear it. I should have stopped there, but it was called "Charlie," how bad could it be?
Yeah, not good. It's like one the Sopranos going "Charlie, Chucky-boy my man."
I'm not a man.
:/

So that'll teach me...for a while. :)

Most interesting thing to happen to tennis since...since nothing! Tennis sucks. Buffalos rule! 

I call it the "stupids"

It's a condition of temporary stupidity that happens when you're pregnant. And by you, I mean me.
This is more of announcement that the is-it-a-boy-or-a-girl-ultrasound won't be until Friday, not Thursday as I had previously thought. Apparently though my appointment truly is on Thursday their technician is only in the office two days a week, namely Monday and Friday. Anyway, they had told me this but I forgot. I got it all straight this morning.
I have to confess that I'm not looking forward to the doctor visit because most of the time when I call I get Skipper on the other end of the line. It's hard to trust Skipper in matters of my unborn child. It kinda makes me want to ask if her mom is at home. But then I think, "Do I sound like a dingbat when I answer the phone at my job?" I am required to be peppy-- no, I can't be that bad.
And in a mostly unrelated way, I have signed us up for happy vegetable club. Okay, it's called Mariquita Farms (not to be confused with marguarita farms, which i guess would just grow limes and cactus). It's neat, and I'm gonna try cooking with stuff like nettles, which Kevin says aren't worth a turd to cook with. Challenge!

Muchos Gracias Marie Callender!

My best no-nonsense food quote this pregnancy:

"I'm here for pie."

(what I told the hostess on our late night pie run to Marie Callender's last night. And oh ye-ah, we got pie!)

who wants a fridge?

craigslist take it away

you know you want it. c'mon, look at it, we're practically giving it away. Sears can't even touch that price.

(oh please someone buy it!!!!)

Franklin just made himself comfy on Andrew's lap. He just wants a lap...and a foot I guess. 

mojito and the subsequent lick-attack. sorry Peter. 

check out the cute hanging lanterns! thank you Cost Plus! 

yep blurry, but you can tell that we ate on the floor...this was after dinner when I let the dogs roam free. 

Bete'avon Passover!

Passover was a success! I can be a super hostess if I have all day to prepare. :)
I moved a bunch of stuff around to make the dining room party-appropriate and I cooked my tukis off. I told my friends who came it felt like a holy thanksgiving-- so many things to keep track of, so many dishes!
Sorry the photos are a bit blurry, I didn't want a flash in some but I didn't want to make everyone stop and hold a pose. You can get the feel from them, I'm sure.

it's a pattern

Today was the second day in two weeks that I have filled the spare moments of my work day with writing a post by hand, and then when I get home, I don't want to type it out into a real post. It feels like a rehash, even though I'm the only one that's read it. There were some points of interest...
-it's really hard to stay awake in an office designed to soothe. The low lighting, smooth jazz, gentle breeze from an open window, 75 degrees, with a full stomach doing quiet clerical work.
-My car which rarely ever has problems, dealt me a one-two-punch today. It hurt, big bill, it hurt bad.
-Baby products are a friggin racket! I finally understand why baby superstores exist--- because you need 3 different carseats! Buncha crap. You can buy one converts like a 3 in 1, but it costs the same as three separate ones so I don't see the savings.
It's the kind of thing that makes me want to trim other baby products and/or question their necessity. Like, do I really need a baby tub? Probably not.
In fact, I've already started noticing silly products that people don't need (and only add to the kid-insanity in their life). Here's a few:
tacky!
cold day in Hell
this would make me run away

I also really despise little tykes plastic outdoor things that litter people's yards and get all nasty and spidery, like cheap slides and playhouses. However, I have found one exception: c'mon that's funny

ze frenchie

I just turned on the Eukanuba Dog Show and Ozzy the french bulldog won his category! Yay! Take that poodle!
kinda looked like this

the butt-sniffin out-take 

I had to do it...lei, boston terrier, too cute. 

An exemplary pile
courtesy of a Mr. Bill Walker 

Pile Diving!

It's "pile week" in Santa Clara. Or as it's officially called by the city "Annual Clean-Up Campaign."
We've been saving up all our crap for a whole year for this big event! We had all kinds of stuff crammed on the side of our house: old mattress, stryofoam, palets, cardboard, nothing really all that great for people to pilage. However, other homes throw out little jewels and the rest of the city prowls around to snatch them up before the next mexi-van comes by.
It makes me feel more in touch with the community this weekend before the piles are carted away. Half the city is driving slowly through the neighborhoods scouting out what people are tossing away. Kevin and I were no exception! We walked the dogs yesterday and got some good pieces of wood to make a new crawlspace cover (yes random) and on the way back there was a lovely little coffee table that I thouught had already been gobbled up by a sinister tan Saturn earlier that day. But no! It was still there! So I sat on it while kevin took back the dogs (and the wood) and then came back for me and the table. I didn't care that I looked like a weirdo sitting on a coffee table in the street (especially since the people who threw it out were in their front yard), that was my table!
This morning after church we joined the tour-of-curbs once again. I was embarrassed to swipe yet another table (a side table that matched the one from the day before!) while the people were watching from their garage. But it's ours now!

an "Emily" post

I came upon Etiqutte Hell while browsing to see if, in this barren land of rudeness known as California, any kid's manners classes are offered.
(I know, it'll be like 10 years before I have a child old enough! I was just looking)
I had hoped it would be funnier, but it's just a collection of stories people tell, I'd say gossip stories, about tacky people. However, if you click on "Holiday Hell" the first story is pretty funny. And while I can tell similiar stories about my family, this one is nice and condensed, chock full of uncomfortable moments and dysfunctional people.

Here's another good exerpt that struck a chord:
".. .my husband's oldest sister called to inform us that she was making a quilt for the baby...it came up that not only was she making a quilt, but a set of fitted sheets, a bumper pad, a diaper holder, a changing table cover, wall hangings AND a diaper bag, and wanted to know if there were any windows in the nursery so that she could make curtains, too...She just assumed it was okay for her to do this, and our job was to simply be grateful that she was taking it upon herself to decorate our baby's room. SHE had decided on a Noah's Ark theme, and was very enthusiastic about how adorable it was...It also didn't matter that Noah's Ark is the one nursery scheme that I absolutely loathe. I know a lot of people think the animals and the boat are cute and all, and I do see why, but personally, I just see it as the greatest natural disaster in the history of mankind, and have no interest in decorating my child's room with it."

I hence count my blessings.


p.s. I submitted a story for the site, namely the time that Kevin's parents said they didn't like my name! The lack of comments spurred me to take the story to the next level.

Can't hide it!

So I'm big enough for even old men to notice I'm "with bun", namely those that I come in contact with at work. That creeps me out. I wish I could wear something *really* distracting so people wouldn't know my business.

In art terms:
I'm beginning to feel like this .

I did not wear that much spandex. 

I yoga'd

I had never done yoga before, because it seemed a little too one-with-the-earth, but since it's supposed to be good for birthin' babies, I bought a preggy yoga tape and did it this morning. I felt really silly, especially because Kevin was in the same room for some of it, but they're right when they say it helps your conentration becuase you fall over if you laugh. Of course the woman used as the example person was like human origami, and I was not. It appeals to my love of not wearing shoes and not moving too much, heh, so I give the yoga a thumbs up.
Now to the chores!

challenge!

This is the layout for wall one of the baby's room, tentatively.I know, I know, I'm crazy. But I can't help but push myself, I'm a painter for goodness sake, I can't just do clouds and flowers!(ignore the equations, those are nixed) 

sport quote

Kevin (and sometimes I) like to watch MLS soccer.
The commentators were interviewing the owner of the San Jose Earthquakes during the game...
commentator: "You sound so corporate.
owner: "Really? I'm not wearing underwear."

"waterloo, promise to love you for ever more"

I work in an office that has mandatory easy-listening music. This means the local play-the-same-20-songs-over-and-over station, that you never liked to begin with, or the same 5 CDs on rotation for 8 hours at a time. So I think I'm now an expert on bad artists and especially bad lyrics. I have created a short list, with examples, of artists who unashamedly write bad lyric-songs (and torture me 4 days a week):
In no particular order
-Seal. --ex. "Baby, I have compare you to a kiss from a rose on a grey"
-Five for Fighting. --ex. "I’m more than a plane, more than some pretty face beside a train"
-Abba. --as if I needed an ex. "Mamma mia, here I go again" (and they made a musical from them! what am I saying? musicals have stupid lyrics too)
-Bush. --ex. "If I treated you bad, you bruise my face...glycerine"
-No Doubt. --ex. "Sorry I'm not home right now, I'm walking into spiderwebs"
-Nickelback. --ex. "These five words in my head scream "Are we having fun yet?"
-Shania Twain. --ex. "Oh, oh, oh, I wanna be free-yeah, to feel the way I feel
Man! I feel like a woman!"
-Avil Lavigne. --ex. "I like you the way you are, when we're drivin' in your car"
-Madonna. --ex. "Zephyr in the sky at night I wonder, do my tears of mourning sink beneath the sun"

To prove my belief that only dumb people request these songs and put them on the top 20 list/station I have a quote from Top 20 website...
"I like that Arvil song "Complicated" good stuff on this chart I gonna be adult soon so I hope that song still on No.1 till that time"

Yeah.

CBEST in show

I took the CBEST test this morning, the California Basic Education Skills Test to those of you outside the backasswards world of California education. It's the test graduates take to qualify their two year credentialing program, or as I call it, throwing-more-money-down-the-state-tube-program. And since I'm not planning on spending more than my car is worth on more schooling at this juncture, it also happens to be the test I need to take to substitute teach.
It was pretty dang easy, as I expected. Easier than the ACT test I took when I was in high school. I think that means I was over-qualified to have subbed my own classes. It scares me that I've heard of people failing the test 3 times in a row. How did they get out of college? Is that what happens when you're a liberal arts major?
Another glaring contrast to the standardized tests of high school, was how strict the "proctors" were. Here are some examples:
1) We were not allowed within 30 feet of the testing rooms until 5 minutes before the test began. What, were we gonna plant cherry bombs in the trash cans?
2) No water allowed in the classroom. If you need to drink water during the 4 hours of the test, you have to bring a bottle in, but leave it next to the door. Then you must raise your hand, wait for the test-warden to come over and give you an orange piece of paper that allows you to get up out of your desk, pick up your water, walk outside the classroom and drink it there. Same also for pee breaks, but hopefully the person would go further than just outside the door. As the 50 year old woman behind me said "we're not children."
3) No cell phones or calculators, if you have one, you have to take it up to the front of the room, and mark it with our ID #. If caught with one on your person, your test is void.
4) State issued photo ID required. It had to be on the desk at all times and when the proctor came around to check us in, she said "you have to make the same face you're making in the photo" and we all thought she was kidding (this would've been her only joke) but she wasn't. She really made us make the face. Good thing I make the same bad smile when prompted by any government official. Oh and out of a whole room of international students, the only one the woman couldn't say was mine, Thayer. What's with that?
I did learn some interesting things from the reading selections that they provided for reading comprehension questions. Like to catch a hoop snake , you wait for it to go towards a wooden fence. Then feed it one hardboiled egg, and once it's head is thru the fence pickets, feed it another one and it'll be stuck. How bout that?
There were also two articles about Rachel Carson, the marine biologist heroine of early American ecology. Go Rachel, you matter.

okay one more thing

I found this pregnancy food guide article of genius on MSN:

"Treat yourself to something sweet on occasion
Processed foods, packaged snacks, and sugar-loaded desserts shouldn't be the mainstay of your diet, but you don't have to give up all your favorite goodies just because you're pregnant. Some smart -- and tasty -- snack ideas: Try a banana smoothie, a frozen all-fruit nonfat sorbet, or yogurt-covered pretzels and trail mix. However, don't beat yourself up if you cave in to temptation -- the occasional cookie or piece of cake won't hurt you or your baby. For more ideas, read about healthy fixes for junk food cravings. "

Um yeah thanks! I was really worried that a ho ho might harm my unborn child, idiots. Oh and uh huh, when I want chocolate cake, I'll just reach for that trail mix, that'll hit the spot, won't it? Who wrote that crap?

signed,
she who eats betty crocker frosting by the spoonful out of the can

capybara butt! thank you google. 

sooner or later, it was bound to be in a post

The capybara is my favorite animal. I would have one as a pet if it was legal, and I had a spare swamp. Llamas come a close second, I know that may come as a shock to some. They are indeed the world's largest rodent, and if that isn't enough to please ya, they "[look] rather like a cross between a Guinea-pig and a Hippopotamus." Does it get anymore funny than that?
I was spurred to post about them from tonight's Thayer encounter. The Thayers, being botantically inclined people needed to know what kind of tree was growing in someone's yard a few blocks away. So they investigated (I'll save you the entertaining morsels of how they went about it, because I think it would embarrass Kevin) and found out it was a Catalpa tree. And to be difficult I said "a capybara tree?" no a catalpa "capybara?" with the intent of confusing Kevin into forgetting. It worked until his mom ruined my game and reminded him on the way home-- no fun. Okay I know you're curious here's the tree
I know what you're thinking: Capybaras are way better than Catalpas. I completely agree.

My blog name couldn't fit more today

This morning I think I may have gotten my first professional mural job. I painted a palm tree in our office, per request, and this morning one of our pregnant patients asked who did it. I said that I did and it went on logically from there. Stupid me didn't have my business cards with me, but I wrote my info an a bright orange piece of paper, heh. She asked me to bring her more cards so she can give them to her friends. Hooray for that too! I'm getting the same self doubt that i did before Easter , like I don't know what I'm doing. But I do, I guess. I like working with a net that's all.
In the meantime, I keep tweaking my friend's business cards, but I gotta frickin' finish them soon, I think she needs them on saturday! (they do look cute though, Jenn!)
And now I have to go back to work for session two of our "big meeting" about the future of the office. Arg. Me no likey. Aren't I just "desk girl," why am I suddenly required to make a business plan...more later gotta drive back to the mine...

sad

A guy that I went to jr. high and high school with died recently and there was no record of it, when I searched on Google. That made me sad for him.
And although this won't come up on Google either, I feel the need to dedicate today's post to him:
Justin Herriage 1981-2005

alright, let me explain the phenomenon

moun·tain wom·an, n.
1) Any woman who of her own volition lives in the Santa Cruz Mountains, whose make-up to flannel ratio is 0:5, has been wronged by any man but especially "the man" and is consequently embittered towards society and non-mountain women.(fig a.)
2) Menopausal woman with free time and money that become self-proclaimed artists (with little skill and alot of opinion) who fill up rosters at local college art classes, wear flowy clothing/bad jeans and handmade jewelry.(fig b.)

This group of women is not unique to the Bay Area but I must say this is a hot bed for these people. You will find them at local craft fairs, farmer's markets, gay rights rallys, and liberal bookstores. They often travel in groups for safety, lunching together and complaining about Christians.

This made my day!

According to "Good Eats":
The world’s largest doughnut, made on July 9, 1978
in Richardson Texas, weighed about 74 pounds.

Woooooo - hooooo!!

Go Richardson! Yay!